More on my friend, Jeff Wilson . . . and a bit about the recalls
Folks, these two topics aren’t as far removed as they seem. My best friend’s name was Jeff Wilson; he lived in Fort Collins, Colorado, and as I said earlier today, he died on Sunday morning at the age of 47.
Jeff was a political watcher, just as I am, and was keenly interested in the recall of Governor Scott Walker and also in the recall of my own sitting State Senator, Van Wanggaard (R-Racine). Jeff believed, as I do, that Walker and Wanggaard overreached drastically back in February due to SB10 — that being the budget bill that stripped public employee union members of their rights to collectively bargain. So me continuing to pursue the recalls, even though I really feel terrible about Jeff’s passing, is the right thing to do. It’s what he’d want me to do.
The recalls of both Walker and Wanggaard will start at 12:01 a.m. on Tuesday morning — that is, about two hours from now. Some people are going in their pajamas to get the recall papers; some are going straight from football parties (as the Packers are playing tonight; currently they’re up 31-7 in the third quarter). I won’t be doing that; I’ll be lighting a candle, again, in my good friend’s memory. But tomorrow afternoon, I will be going if at all possible to the recall office and will not only sign to get Walker and Wanggaard out, but will take the training so I can perhaps train others to do the same thing.
As I said before, Jeff was a deeply principled and ethical man. He had a very strong moral compass. He knew what he believed was right and he did that; nothing else need apply, and that was one of his best qualities to my mind (I suppose it matched my stubbornness rather well). That’s why he supported, very strongly, the recall of these two men; he even mentioned it on Friday during our last conversation.
It’s very hard right now to concentrate on anything because I feel so terribly about Jeff’s untimely passing. He was getting better. Everything looked good. I believed I could get out there to see him, and would’ve found a way as I was looking really hard; I also know that Jeff looked forward to my telephone calls, and that my encouragement and support meant a great deal to him — as me talking to him, knowing he was alive and fighting as hard as he could, meant a great deal to me because I knew he’d have done the same thing if I’d have been in his place.
So while I still want to recall Walker and Wanggaard and try to restore some balance to my state (all three branches of government right now are controlled by radical, hard-right Rs), it’s muted even though I’ve been looking forward to this day for months. I hope you can understand why.
While Heaven, or the positive afterlife (“the Good Place (TM)”), whatever you want to call it, has gained an angel, I feel absolutely devastated. Jeff and I were friends for a long time — six years, maybe a bit more — and he was my best friend, the person who understood me the best, and the person I understood the best also. Maybe it’s selfish of me, but I would much rather Jeff be here, and be upset at not being home where he wanted to be (a completely understandable reaction, to my mind), and me be able to talk with him directly and him with me, directly, than Heaven gaining him as an angel.
Because when one good person dies, the whole world loses, whether the world knew this person or not. In Jeff’s case, as he was a very, very good person, the world’s loss is nearly incalculable. And my own — well, I have no words to describe it, except to say that I wish with everything I have that this hadn’t happened.
I wanted to be there, to hold his hand, and to be able to give him a hug. I thought him seeing me, seeing my caring and concern, would make a difference. I wasn’t able to get there but was working hard to do so; obviously, I didn’t get that chance.
And while I don’t know if me getting there would’ve made a difference to him, it assuredly would’ve for me — being able to see him and touch him and hold his hand would’ve helped a lot right now.
I’m doing my best to remember the good times and positive memories of the excellent conversations Jeff and I had about all sorts of wide-ranging subjects. That’s the only way to deal with grief, really; you can’t forget, and you can’t “move on,” but you can go on with your memories and never, ever forget the wonderful people who have graced your life.
I’ve had two, now. My wonderful, amazing, extremely intelligent and talented husband, Michael. And my astonishingly smart, gifted, and remarkably talented friend, Jeff. So I’ve been doubly blessed, and I know that, even though I really wish both of them were here on this plane of existence rather than the positive afterlife I’m sure they’re enjoying right now because I miss them both more than words could ever say.
——–
** Note: As I’ve said before, there’s no question in my mind Michael would want me to pursue the recall efforts also. Michael was deeply principled also, and believed hypocrisy was among the worst sins known to mankind — Van Wanggaard has been guilty of that, in spades — while pitting brother against brother, sister against sister, the way Scott Walker did, is right down there, too. So with my extremely heavy heart, I will do my best to oust these two politicians and send them home to pursue a different course of employment . . . and hope whoever takes their places will be much better public servants than either of these two, or even both of them put together.
Odds and Ends
I’ve been too busy to update my blog the last few days . . . so here’s what’s been going on.
First, my car died — well, the engine blew out (all four cylinders went at the same time, along with the head gasket) on a rainy, blustery evening. I sat by the side of the road for close to an hour, without the heater going because I was more worried about keeping battery power for the hazard lights . . . I didn’t know what had gone wrong, just that something really bad happened when I tried rounding a turn and rather than accelerating, the car went down to 10 mph, then zero — I had inertia and nothing else left to get off the road. As I was in a bad spot (no lights), the hazards were the priority . . . fortunately I didn’t get hit, the car was towed into the garage I use (Wild Rides in Racine; good and honest mechanics), and I was able to find out what was wrong.
However, my car was fourteen years old and I knew this wasn’t the only problem with it. Even if I had repaired the engine, I didn’t have any idea what would go next (and as I’ve replaced a number of things in recent years, I knew my car had reached the end of its natural lifespan — if cars can be said to have lifespans); the best solution was to get another car, which I did.
But car shopping, even when it goes well, is exhausting; perhaps that’s why I still feel so drained today (as I found out the engine was blown Thursday, and went car shopping on Friday). I did find a car I liked, though; another small one (I like those the best).
Second, I did manage about 1000 more words, up to maybe 3000 total, in chapter 21 of CHANGING FACES (the work-in-progress for NaNo). So that’s good.
I practiced four times this week and my hands are handling it, which is also good . . . most of my technique is there, but the carpal tunnel syndrome makes itself felt every now and again despite my best efforts. Still, I’m glad to be able to play, as for many years, I couldn’t.
Next, I await the recalls of Governor Scott Walker, Lieutenant Governor Rebecca Kleefisch, and my own Republican Senator, Van Wanggaard. All of those papers should be filed on November 15, 2011; we’ll have sixty days to get enough signatures (I know it’s over 540,000 needed, statewide, for both Walker and Kleefish, and it’s 1/4 of whatever the total vote was in district 21, which includes most of Racine County and the city of Racine, for Van Wanggaard) to force a recall election. I believe all three of them will be voted out once a recall election is called; still, all the procedures must be taken care of to get to the end result.
And finally, while I know I’m quite low energy today, I will do whatever I can to give emotional and psychological support to my friends and family, most especially to my good friend Jeff. (But that’s not really news.)
Just reviewed Three Pernese Novels for SBR
Folks, I reviewed Dragonheart, Dragongirl, and Dragon’s Time — the first two by Todd J. McCaffrey (né Johnson) and the third by Todd J. McCaffrey and Anne McCaffrey — just now at SBR.
Here’s the link:
As it says . . . I found these novels to be competent. The middle one, Dragongirl, had a few moments where I really liked it but others I just couldn’t stand. All three of these novels received relatively low marks from me, the last one (Dragon’s Time) getting a B-.
I’m aware of how difficult it is to write in someone else’s universe as I’m trying to finish my late husband Michael’s work and he doesn’t write much like me at all. Plus, I’ve read the Brandon Sanderson-finished “Wheel of Time” books — so far, there are two out, with one more due next year — and have them on the list at Shiny Book Review (SBR) to be reviewed in coming days.
So saying something is competent isn’t a slap at Todd McCaffrey in the slightest; what I’m mostly saying is that there’s not much life to the writing, and that I didn’t get engrossed in the stories. Someone else probably will feel differently than I do as reviewing is always a highly subjective art; also, even though I do feel sympathy and understanding to a degree with regards to Mr. McCaffrey (by the way, Anne McCaffrey and I are no relation whatsoever, not even through marriage; my late husband Michael used to say he wanted to have her career, though), I can only review the book that’s in front of me. Which is exactly what I did.
So, should you read these three books? If you enjoy the “Dragonriders of Pern” series (these being the twenty-second, twenty-third, and twenty-fourth novels in the series), you’ve probably already picked them up. But if you haven’t read any of them, I’d skip these and read the original trilogy instead — that’s Dragonflight, Dragonquest, and The White Dragon, all by Anne McCaffrey.
Ohio Voters Have Spoken; It’s “NO!” on Issue 2
Tonight, Ohio voted on Issue 2, which was whether or not Senate Bill 5 should be upheld. By a 61-39% margin, Ohio’s voters have spoken — and the word is “No.”
Don’t know what Senate Bill 5 was? Well, in essence it struck down collective bargaining for everyone in the state of Ohio, including firefighters, nurses, teachers, policemen, and snowplow drivers. And while most people believe public employees should pay more for their health care coverage or not get raises during a terrible economic climate, most don’t want to go so far as eliminating all forms of collective bargaining, as it’s a classic Republican overreach.
That’s why many people wanted it overturned, and voted accordingly. Because SB 5 went too far.
Here’s a link to the Huffington Post article:
Ohioans overturned a divisive anti-union law on Tuesday, delivering a significant defeat to Republican Gov. John Kasich and a victory to labor unions.
Ohio voters rejected Issue 2, a ballot referendum on Senate Bill 5, a measure that restricts collective bargaining rights for more than 360,000 public employees, among other provisions. Opposition to the legislation inspired large protests from residents around the state this year.
AFL-CIO President Richard Trumka was quoted in this same article as saying:
“One message rang loud and clear tonight in Ohio and across the country: those who spend their time scapegoating workers and pushing a partisan agenda will only strengthen the resolve of working people,” said AFL-CIO President Richard Trumka. “From the very beginning, it’s been clear that Gov. Kasich, and indeed many politicians, were pushing an agenda that was about politics, not about solving our nation’s problems or creating jobs.”
Ohio Governor John Kasich (R), who worked hard to keep Senate Bill 5 on the books, was quoted as saying that he needs to “take a deep breath,” though his concession speech was gracious. From the same HuffPo article:
“The people have spoken clearly. You don’t ignore the public. Look, I also have an obligation to lead. I’ve been leading since the day I took this office, and I’ll continue to do that. But part of leading is listening and hearing what people have to say to you.”
(An aside: hear that, Gov. Scott Walker (R-WI)? Heed Kasich’s message and you might be retained; no matter what, you will be recalled.)
Someone the HuffPo article describes as “a spokesman for the International Association of Firefighters, who was not authorized to speak on the record,” had this to say:
“Kasich ran on a platform of growth, and his first thing is to give tax breaks to the rich, increase the pay of his staff significantly — while at the same time, he’s trying to cut the firefighters and police and teachers and nurses. It’s an overreach,” he said. “They went a little too far, and what’s happening here in Ohio is another step in what happened in Wisconsin.”
So that’s it; the people of Ohio have spoken. Senate Bill 5 has been defeated.
May the happy dance commence.
DWTS Week Eight: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
Tonight, there were only five stars left on “Dancing with the Stars” to battle it out for spots in the semi-finals next week. These stars are Nancy Grace with pro partner Tristan MacManus, Rob Kardashian with pro partner Cheryl Burke, Ricki Lake with pro partner Derek Hough, Hope Solo with pro partner Maksim Chmerikovskiy, and last but not least, J.R. Martinez with pro partner Karina Smirnoff. The dance levels varied widely, and so did the performances, but everyone did as well as they possibly could.
That said, it’s time for some serious critiquing.
Best of the night: J.R. Martinez/Karina Smirnoff. I’ve said this before, but Martinez is so good that he often looks like a male pro until he makes a mistake, or has his body in a position a male pro would not take. Martinez is the class of this field, and he had an outstanding night tonight.
Prediction for tomorrow: Safe. (Easily.)
Second best of the night: Rob Kardashian/Cheryl Burke. Kardashian moves stiffly and doesn’t pick his feet up off the floor very often, but he’s shown the most improvement. Both dances tonight were good.
Prediction for tomorrow: Probably safe. (Should be, but may not be depending on the strength of his fan base.) If he hits the B2, he’ll go home.
Third best of the night (tie): Ricki Lake/Derek Hough. As always, Hough’s choreography was outstanding, but Lake is hurt and it’s very easy to tell. She was good, but not outstanding; Kardashian was actually a little better, and he has far less talent than does Lake.
Prediction for tomorrow: Bottom 2, will be retained for semi-finals. (Once again, if Kardashian hits the B2, he’s gone.)
Third best of night (tie): Hope Solo/Maksim Chmerikovskiy. They danced better than I’ve ever seen them in both dances. They received the “kiss and make up” edit, and the “most improved dancer” type of remarks; they’re not going anywhere.
Prediction for tomorrow: Safe.
Fifth and last: Nancy Grace/Tristan MacManus. I really like MacManus, as I’ve said before; he is a consummate professional, and he has done the best job he — or anyone else — could’ve done with Grace. Ms. Grace is stiff and does not move well, and by this point she is badly outclassed by the competition. This is not merely due to her age (she over 50) or how short she is, or that she’s a fuller-figured woman. (I am a big, beautiful woman myself, so I don’t really care about that.)
Nope, it’s none of that.
Purely and simply, it’s a combination of two things:
1) I don’t like her attitude toward her pro — she seems to be blaming MacManus for why she hasn’t improved, not realizing that at some point natural talent (or the lack of it) has to apply. Maybe Grace would do better at some of these dances if she had more time to study it — that’s almost surely the case — but her complaining about her busy schedule and then saying that MacManus “doesn’t have a full-time job” was just wrong. (Doesn’t Grace realize that teaching her anything has to be the toughest full-time job MacManus has ever had?)
2) Her tango was, at best, tepid. She was given better scores than she deserved, and better comments, too, in her first dance, probably because the judges had seen Grace do the jive last week and knew she was terrible. Her second dance, the “instant jive” (all of the couples had to do this), was awful despite the best efforts of MacManus to showcase her in a positive light; it was so bad that head judge Len Goodman actually told Grace that her time at DWTS was just about up. (I kept expecting him to add the words that usually follow those, “Don’t let the door hit you in the rear on the way out.” But he didn’t; he left those words unsaid.)
Prediction: B2. Will go home. MacManus will breathe a sigh of relief, and so will those of us who watch DWTS.
But my predictions are just that . . . I’m not omniscient, omnipotent, or omnipresent, either, so it’s possible that someone else will go home instead.
What do you think, America?
Life, the Universe, and the Unexpected
Sometimes, life throws you something you really didn’t expect.
Take my good friend Jeff, for example. About a month ago, he felt ill but had no idea what was going on; he was taken to the hospital, where he was found to have a massive infection. He nearly died, as he had to have open-heart surgery due to the infection being too well-rooted in his heart (the antibiotics started to kill it everywhere else, but not in his heart); at the age of only forty-seven, he came way too close to death.
Fortunately, he has survived that. And he sounds like he’s on the mend, though the road back from this is likely to be a long and difficult one. But I have hope that he will fully recover, as his mind, voice, and most of his memories are intact. (More about this below.)
A health crisis like this was completely unexpected — who would ever think something like this would happen? And having gone through something like this, except worse, with my late husband’s Michael’s sudden passing seven years ago didn’t make this any easier from my perspective; I really wanted to be there for Jeff as I care very much about him, I wasn’t able to get there (he lives several states away), and he nearly died.
I’m very glad he survived. (This is an extremely basic way to put it, of course, and I wish I had a better one. But sometimes, the plainest words speak best.) I will do whatever I can to help him in the difficult journey that lies ahead . . . wishing I had better words than this to explain what’s going on, but that’s the best I can do.
Jeff’s near-brush with death has shaken my own faith rather badly. I realize that in no valid religion or spiritual practice will it ever say that good people should survive such terrible things; Michael didn’t survive, though he fought harder than anyone I’ve ever seen to do so, and he was by far the best person I have ever known. (I’m sure he went to the Good Place (TM), too, or wherever it is wonderful people go after this life ends.) But for Jeff to first suffer the vagaries of this horrible economy, then have this happen to him and me having no way to get to him to even try to help, seems to add insult to injury. (Not to me. To my friend.) And that he’s going to have to work like the dickens just to get back to where he was . . . well, that he has the chance to do so is what I’d prayed for, so I’m glad of that. But it seems . . . unjust, at best.
Of course, no one ever promised that life would be fair, even to good people like my friend. But does life have to be this unfair?
I know, I know. We don’t have all the answers. Sometimes we can’t even ask the right questions. Being able to persevere is what makes the difference, to my mind, between a successful person and an unsuccessful one. And I know Jeff will persevere, because I view him as a successful person (I always have), no matter what’s going on all around him externally.
Jeff’s mind has returned to him, thankfully, but not all of his memories have. I’m happy he remembered I am a saxophonist; when I told him that I’ve been playing, and am now in a symphonic band, he was very congratulatory and he meant it. But he’s forgotten all about his favorite of my unfinished novels, CHANGING FACES — the one I’m working on for NaNo right now — though he remembers the Elfyverse (the completed and looking for a home novel ELFY, the in-progress AN ELFY ABROAD and the prequel, KEISHA’S VOW), which I found out when I mentioned the latter novel.
When I told him that he’s been asking me for the past two-plus years to please finish CHANGING FACES and be done with it, I got no reaction from him; then I explained how long I’ve been working on it, and that I’d written 6000-plus words into chapter 20 and have 600-plus in chapter 21 after it being stalled out for nearly one and a half years. He recognized that as an achievement, and congratulated me on it, but it didn’t really mean much to him because he can’t remember the plotline, at all.
That the main reason I started working on CHANGING FACES as my NaNo project is because I wanted to do something, no matter how tangential, that I felt Jeff would appreciate as my way to honor him and what he was going through. Maybe it sounds silly that this was my motivation for re-opening this MSS, but there it is.
I wanted to write something that I felt Jeff would like to read down the road, when he’s again capable of reading well (right now, he isn’t, and this is a skill he’ll have to work hard to regain). So writing this newest chapter of CHANGING FACES was my way to express to my friend Jeff, without words, “I believe you have a future, and I want you to read this in that future.” But I wasn’t able to explain this well to him tonight. At all. (Though of course I’ll try again tomorrow, providing I’m able to reach him.)
Jeff is a very spiritual person, with a strong grasp of what’s going on in this world; to my mind, he nearly personifies the phrase “down to Earth.” He’s an intelligent, funny, interesting person with a great many gifts and talents, who’s been hampered by a pitiful economy and a less than stellar personal situation that was all of a sudden made much worse due to his health crisis. Jeff is a writer, a Webmaster, and is very hard-working in his own idiosyncratic way; I’m very grateful that he’s doing so much better, and I believe his strong will and deep faith will sustain him over time.
All that being said, I wish this hadn’t happened to him. Because he truly doesn’t deserve it.
Just Reviewed Julia Quinn’s “Just Like Heaven” at SBR
Folks, if you like historical romances with farcical elements, you will enjoy JUST LIKE HEAVEN by Julia Quinn. I called it “solid, funny, and smart” in my review, which was just posted at Shiny Book Review . . . anyway, please go to this link:
http://shinybookreview.wordpress.com/2011/11/05/julia-quinns-just-like-heaven-solid-funny-and-smart/
Enjoy!
Occupy Writers: Articulate Speakers for the Bottom 99%
Tonight, via MSNBC’s “Rachel Maddow Show,” I found out about the Website Occupy Writers because Maddow had author Daniel Handler (aka Lemony Snicket) on to discuss his recent post at that site. A few of Lemony Snicket’s salient points from his post at Occupy Writers follow:
6. Nobody wants to fall into a safety net, because it means the structure in which they’ve been living is in a state of collapse and they have no choice but to tumble downwards. However, it beats the alternative.
and
11. Historically, a story about people inside impressive buildings ignoring or even taunting people standing outside shouting at them turns out to be a story with an unhappy ending.
(Good words. I can’t top them.)
Note that OccupyWriters.com is where many of my favorite authors have signed up in support of the Occupy Wall Street/Occupy Everything Else movement that’s going on right now. A few of my favorite science fiction and fantasy authors who’ve signed their names in support at that site include Rosemary Edghill, Mercedes Lackey, Tamora Pierce, Melinda Snodgrass, Laura Resnick, Laura Anne Gilman, Ursula K. LeGuin, and Neil Gaiman — I’m sure there were more, but those were the ones I noted right away. There are many, many writers on that list, some who are extremely well-known (like Salman Rushdie), some who are well-known to SF/F readers like myself (see above) and some who aren’t known — including some editors of various magazines, including Esquire and Harper’s Bazaar. (I’d gladly sign my name to the list, too, but I don’t have a novel published yet. Otherwise, I’d have done this as soon as I knew the site was available.)
What I think is great about OccupyWriters.com is that it shows that people who are creative understand what’s going on in this world. Our economy is not just bad; it’s truly terrible, and it’s something that all Americans — not just the “bottom 99%” — should care about. These writers get that, which is great.
Now, it’s time for the top 1%, like those who sit in the United States Congress, to realize that without the “bottom 99%,” nothing gets done in this country. Period.
Speaking of that, CNN’s Jack Cafferty has an excellent blog about why the Congress doesn’t seem to care at all about the “bottom 99%”. This is because they, themselves, benefitted from the horrible policies they instituted — greatly.
During the height of the recession, Congress actually became 25% richer. Meaning they were “feathering their own nests” while the rest of us got the shaft — as disgusting as this is, there’s more to the story.
From Cafferty’s blog post:
“Roll Call” reports that members of Congress had a collective net worth of more than $2 billion in 2010.
That was up about 25 percent from 2008, during the height of the recession.
And these wealth totals likely underestimate how rich Congress really is. That’s because they don’t include homes and other non-income generating property, which could come out to hundreds of millions in additional dollars.
This wealth is split fairly evenly between both Democrats and Republicans.
Overall, about 200 members of Congress are millionaires. Once again, this doesn’t include the value of their homes.
So did you catch all that? As bad as this is that the Congress is so much wealthier, overall, than the rest of the country — including the vast majority of their own constituents — this doesn’t even include the value of their homes or other property, which anyone else would have to claim as a matter of course as part of his or her overall wealth.
Cafferty continues a bit lower with:
Another expert suggests members of Congress do better with their investments than the average American because they are privy to inside information.
Really? Seriously? They would take advantage of that… something that is clearly illegal for the rest of us?
The bottom line is this body of lawmakers has next to nothing in common with the average American. Yet we keep sending most of the same rat pack back year after year.
Here’s my question to you: What does it say when members of Congress got 25% richer during the height of the recession?
I don’t know about anyone else, but what it says to me is that Congress is behaving in an unethical, immoral, blatantly dishonest manner. And it once again reminds me why we must be vigilant, watch what our representatives do (not just what they say), and perhaps most importantly of all, keep an eye on who — and what — is financing their campaigns.
This is why I, for one, intend to vote out as many wealthy incumbents who are in Congress as I possibly can. In this case, there’s one name who tops my list — my long-time Representative, Paul Ryan (R-Janesville), who clearly has forgotten that most of his constituents make far less money than he does. Ryan has done himself no favors, either, as he’s shown little to no understanding of the whole “Occupy” movement, nor any compassion as to how difficult it is nowadays to find work in America — even for our honored military veterans, some of whom have gone out in support at various “Occupy” protests and have been hurt badly by police, most especially in Oakland, California.
And I’m sorry; I cannot support anyone who doesn’t want to help promote job growth in this country. Rep. Ryan’s been in office for twelve whole years; he’s had twelve years to try to improve the economy, and he’s done very little about it. Ryan has obviously lost touch with the people of his district, and more importantly, the people of this country. If he can’t even figure out that the economy is in the tank, so the House of Representatives should have better things to do with their time than re-affirm “In God We Trust” as the official motto of the United States (as they did earlier this week) rather than take up any measure that could possibly help create employment in this country (see previous post for details), I know that just about anyone would do a better job as my US Rep. than Paul Ryan.
Worse yet, he’s said several times that he doesn’t understand the “Occupy” movement; he doesn’t believe it’s helpful. Yet military veterans, who Ryan claims to appreciate, are coming home to no jobs and a 12% unemployment rate, which is why some are going to “Occupy” protests across the US of A in order to ask, “Where are the jobs, and why doesn’t anybody in Washington, DC, or in the halls of power seem to care?”
I’m sorry; if you can’t be bothered to understand why people are upset because there’s a high unemployment rate overall, including a very high unemployment rate for returning military vets who’ve fought the wars in Iraq, Afghanistan, and Libya, it’s time for you to go.
So please, Mr. Ryan — don’t let the door hit you in the rear on the way out.
————–
I, indeed, am an “Occupy Writer” even if I never am able to sign that petition — and I hope that I’ve done my level best to speak for the bottom 99% this evening, even if I did originally say “top 99%” because I was thinking about our morals, manners, and ethics — where we are, indeed, the top 99%, and those who don’t get it have to be the bottom 1% in these areas.
Cell Phone Etiquette, Redux
Folks, a while back I wrote a post about cell phone etiquette, and I’d hoped that I’d exhausted that subject. However, I’ve noticed two more problems lately and I wanted to discuss them.
First, if you are in a business meeting, please stay off your cell phone even if all you’re doing is sending text messages. Texting people during meetings is rude and disrespectful to those who are giving business presentations; it’s also rude and disrespectful to your colleagues, who are there to listen and/or speak . . . how can you possibly be learning or speaking if you’re spending your whole time in the business meeting texting someone else?
Second, if you are in a music lesson or in a music rehearsal, stay off your cell phone! Whether you’re texting someone or actually taking a phone call, this isn’t just rude and disrespectful — it’s also extremely annoying. The rest of us are trying to learn something in that lesson or rehearsal; we’re listening to the instructor (in the case of a lesson) or are watching the conductor and/or listening to the conductor’s instructions (in the case of a rehearsal). If someone’s madly texting away, or worse yet, talking on a cell phone, it’s nearly impossible to concentrate on the lesson or rehearsal — so again, do not do this.**
I keep trying to figure out why someone might want to do this, but keep failing; even if there’s a family emergency, you should not be repeatedly texting anyone in a meeting, or in a band rehearsal, or in a music lesson. (In that case, you should acknowledge the message, politely excuse yourself, then get to the person who’s in crisis immediately.) And as for taking a cell phone call during any of these activities? Why do it?
I don’t have a clue why there are people in this world who are so pig-ignorant that they don’t understand this, but let me say it loud and clear for these individuals, so they’ll never forget their manners again:
DO NOT text people during meetings, lessons, or rehearsals, because it is extremely offensive and obnoxious.
Texting other people when you should be concentrating on what’s going on around you also actively hurts those of us who are trying hard to learn something.
There’s no excuse for this behavior, SO JUST DON’T DO IT.
Got it? (Good.)
———–
** And yes, I’ve observed these very things in recent days. How anyone can be texting away during a music rehearsal is beyond me. (Apparently this person has no social skills, or manners, either.)
Barb Caffrey's Blog 