Alleviating Stress During Covid-19 (and Beyond)
Folks, as the Covid-19 pandemic rages on and on, and as the stay-at-home orders in Wisconsin continue (as they do in many places around the world), I thought I’d take a different tactic today.
To wit: What can we do to alleviate stress during this difficult and stressful time? And what may work to alleviate stress down the road, once we’ve finally done with the Covid-19 pandemic?
The main things I do to alleviate stress include reading (what a surprise, no?), writing music, listening to music, sometimes taking a drive (which is still allowed in Wisconsin even under the pandemic rules, providing you stay in your car), and doing word puzzles/word games. I also play some non-word-game related puzzles, and enjoy playing various video games (I’m quite partial to Crazy Cakes 2, a game at Pogo.com. I enjoyed the original Crazy Cakes; the updated version is just as good.)
Mind, I didn’t list “writing” in there — as in, writing words. That’s because lately it hasn’t been alleviating stress for me to write, as I haven’t felt very well in months. (I don’t think that’s much of a surprise, if you’ve been following along with my blog at all.) I still am able to get some words in, here and there, and I’m glad to do it; however, thinking about how I am not able to do as much writing as I want to do tends to give me stress rather than alleviate it.
When I get on a roll with writing, though, there’s nothing better at alleviating stress. Because I can get caught up in the story, and want to know what happens next (if only my pesky characters will tell me!), and it takes me out of my head and my worries for a while when that happens.
For the moment, though, the other things I listed above will have to serve instead. And for the most part, they are helping…though I wish I could write up a storm and truly advance on my various projects, as I think that would help me feel far, far better overall.
What is helping you during this time of crisis and travail? Let me know in the comments!
Facing the Pressure of Illness
Folks, I’ve been under the weather for quite a while now. But I think I’m recovering, albeit slowly.
Now, as to what this is? I don’t know. But I have to treat it as an ongoing illness, and work around it.
I am tired of being sick, but apparently sick isn’t tired of me; because of that, I have to do whatever I can to get past the illness.
Mind, I put a lot of pressure on myself when I’m sick. I want to be well, so badly, and yet it takes time to get better. I go back to work just as soon as I possibly can, and I almost certainly do too much too soon because I worry about all the stuff I wasn’t able to do while at my most ill.
In that way, I try to make strides forward. It can be difficult. And the additional pressure probably doesn’t do me any favors.
Today, I’ve managed to write 700 words of fiction, done a little editing (as I just finished up a major project, I have to take it slowly for a few days to gear up for the next major project’s completion as I have more than one in train), talked with the doctor’s office, talked with the medical supply company, and have gotten all my laundry together. After that, my plan is to do some food shopping, then my laundry, and perhaps edit more tonight providing I have any energy left after that.
In other words, I tend to have two speeds. Full throttle, or all-in. (And the last is not good, because if I’m “all-in,” that means I’m tired out of my mind and have nothing left to give, in case you’re not familiar with that Midwestern idiom.)
Still, I’m working at things, slowly. I’m doing what I can.
Now, onto other things, very briefly:
This ongoing pandemic is not fun by any means. I am worried about my friends, far and near. I am especially worried about estranged friends, people who won’t talk to me but I still care about; I can do nothing for any of them, but I still worry, and I still want to help. (It is a particular quirk of mine, I guess.)
I hope you will all stay as safe as you can.
And I’d wanted to write something bracing about the Nova Scotia shootings, but I still have no words. Everything seems hollow to say, and yet, those folks have to feel like no one cares about them whatsoever due to the ongoing coverage of Covid-19 and almost nothing else.
If you have a spare moment today, say a prayer, think good thoughts, send positive energy, or do whatever your particular spirituality or religion advises when trying to comfort distant friends and allies. And aim that squarely at Nova Scotia, if you can, or at least at the broader target of Canada. Those folks are hurting, scared, and need to know they haven’t been forgotten.
Finally, I hope we’ll all remember that we’re human. We have good in us, even though it doesn’t always show; we can help others, even when it doesn’t seem like it.
Try to do something to help someone else today, even if they don’t know it. The universe will thank you.
Governor Evers Extends Wisconsin’s “Safer-at-home” Order, and I Have Questions…
I apologize for the long, unwieldy title in advance…
Gov. Tony Evers (D-WI) has extended the Wisconsin “Safer-at-home” provisions until the day after Memorial Day, which is in very late May; they were set to expire on April 24, but we all knew it was likely it would be extended a few more weeks at minimum. However, no one expected that it would be extended until late May.
I, for the most part, support the Safer-at-home order. And I said so in an e-mail I just sent to Governor Evers. (Unfortunately the cut-and-paste I had planned so I could show you exactly what I sent went awry, so I’ll have to describe what I said instead.) I urged the Governor to carve out some exceptions for hair salons/barber shops, car washes (we have a very strange situation going on here in Racine County where if the car wash is attached to a gas station, it’s open even if it has human contact, but the car washes without any human contact and total automation are closed because they don’t have an attachment to a gas station), and emergency situations.
Now, what is an emergency situation? (You may be asking this.) I view it as this: you’ve lost something important to you, whether it’s your home, your vehicle, your stove has gone on the fritz and you can’t cook (or your microwave, or hot pot, or whatever you’re using). Or you have just been granted an emergency foster child, but that child is under three and you need a car seat you don’t have (but can’t buy in many counties in Wisconsin, as unless the store has food in it, it isn’t allowed to stay open under the safer-at-home provisions). Or you have lost weight (or perhaps gained it), and your clothes no longer fit or are so frayed you can’t wear them…but again, unless the store has any food in it, you can’t get any clothes to wear. (And I don’t know about you, but unless you can try on things, it’s hard to find something to fit properly. The only things I’ve managed to buy and wear well online are nightgowns. And a few Brewers t-shirts.)
So, I told Governor Evers that.
I also said that while I agree with him that people’s lives are far more important than any amount of money, extending the Safer-at-home order until the day after Memorial Day is too long. We’re about to go into the summer season. And there are folks like my father who have no air conditioning at all. (He doesn’t want any, either.) If you want relief from the heat, you usually have options such as going to the grocery store, going to the movie theatre, going to the Zoo and walking around by Lake Michigan…but right now, you’re supposed to limit your grocery trips to essentials only, the movie theatres are closed, and the Zoo is also closed. (So is the public library. So are most government buildings.)
I said that I would rather he had extended this for another few weeks and re-assessed in mid-May. If there were still Covid-19 hotspots then, I’d understand extending the order a bit more than I do now. But I would wait until then because no one knows what’s happening now, except that they’re scared and they’re broke.
Here’s what I’ll add, though, for folks who know me and have known me a long time (as I am going to assume you have, if you’ve read my blog; if not, you can catch up in the archives if you’d like.) I think people’s lives are far more important than money. And I do think we have to be wary and prudent right now with regards to Covid-19 because it’s a virus with no cure, no treatment, and no way to alleviate.
That said, people are going stir-crazy at home. We have flattened the curve to some degree already. And if it is flattened more in two weeks, I think a graduated restart of Wisconsin’s economy is in order; if it’s not, then maybe Gov. Evers is right and nothing will be done until Memorial Day anyway.
But I would like to know his rationale for this. Why did he pick that date? Why is it that other states Wisconsin is allied with, such as Ohio, have earlier “opening” dates as of this time? Why is it that New York state, which has the worst amount of cases in the nation, is going to try to re-open faster than we are here?
I didn’t say that in my letter to him, but I should’ve.
I do support that we have to stay home more than go out right now. But we also have to realize that businesses will close up shop if they don’t get help. And some of ’em, like beauty salons/barbers, can re-open with limitations (I said in my letter that if five people were getting their hair cut at a time and no more, that would work. That would limit the gathering to ten people or less. And you could maintain social distancing in the salons, too.) Getting a haircut gives you an emotional lift. We need that right now, too.
Rest assured that I did point that out to Gov. Evers.
And the thing with the car washes: Yeah, they’re not essential. But they do give you an emotional lift of sorts for not too much money. Cleaning the car in the late spring and early summertime — and remember, we are about to go into the hotter season, much though it doesn’t feel like it right now — is extremely helpful in many senses, too; it gets the last of the winter sand/salt off the car, which is good for the life of the car. And it helps you spend less money on car maintenance, which we all are going to need because we all are going to have a whole lot less money due to the Covid-19 pandemic.
Anyway, if you, too, live in Wisconsin and want to contact Governor Evers, go to this page and make your comment. (Please be civil, as life is too short for incivility.)
And if you live in other states or countries, write to your public officials about whatever it is that makes no sense to you. Because that’s needed right now — public opinion is vital, especially if it’s reasonably stated.
That’s the only way we’re going to be able to figure out how to go forward with the least amount of stress and heartache.
Easter Musings: The Resurrection of Hope
Folks, I woke up this morning — or afternoon, as the case may be (being the inveterate night owl that I’ve always been) — thinking about the resurrection of Jesus Christ.
This is not surprising. It is Easter, much though it doesn’t feel like it with a pandemic ravaging the world. And around Easter, we usually as a people talk about redemption, hope, faith, and of course the resurrection of Jesus.
But Jesus’s resurrection wasn’t just about being raised from the dead. It was about the hope that something good would come from Jesus’s sacrifice on the cross. It was also about the belief that three women had, mourning outside Jesus’s burial site, for three days. And it was about the astonishment they had, along with the embodiment of their hopes, when Jesus rose again on the third day.
Other ancient religions had talked about resurrection, too. But they hadn’t been so much about hope, it seems to me. And they certainly didn’t talk about the folks who were left behind quite so much as early Christianity did, and has to this day.
We need hope right now, as I’ve said before. But we also have to believe firmly in resurrection, too. Those of you who aren’t Christian (some days I don’t identify with it, other days I do; I’m more like G.K. Chesterton, who once said, “The Christian ideal has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and left untried.”) can still appreciate the idea of resurrection in this sense, as explicated by the Cambridge English Dictionary: the act of bringing something that had disappeared or ended back into use or existence.
Right now, what we’ve viewed as the normal comings and goings of society has disappeared. Ended. And we’re mostly at home, wondering whether the virus known as Covid-19 will ever stop ravaging the Earth. Doctors and nurses and other medical personnel are struggling, as they’re the only ones who have the tools and training to help the rest of us deal with this. And as yet, there is no cure; there is no vaccine to temper the virus, either; there is no therapy; there is nothing.
It is a humbling thing, to know that you can’t stop Covid-19.
Yes, everything we’re doing right now — the vast majority of us in the United States, Canada, Europe, Australia, New Zealand, etc. — helps to mitigate the damage. Staying at home lessens the reach of the virus and allows the amount of people sickened at any one time to flatten out, so hospitals and clinics don’t get overwhelmed. (Or at least not as overwhelmed as they could be.)
Some of you are probably saying, “But Barb. That is not nothing. We are being proactive. We’re staying home, even though we hate it. And we’re doing everything we can to let this virus die out.” (New Zealand, in particular, has been particularly good at squashing this virus flat.)
That’s all true.
But it’s not enough. People are still dying. And the world outside is radically transformed. Economies have crashed, and will continue to do so, until some sort of medical mitigation occurs. Our way of living has suffered; our way of belief, that we can come together as people, and enjoy each other’s company, and lessen each other’s sorrows in person as well as online, has been shown to be, at best, incomplete.
My view is, today should be not just about Jesus Christ, though his life and teachings are well worthy of study.
I think today — the Easter of 2020 — we need to believe in the resurrection of hope. The resurrection that our society will someday get back to some semblance of what we’ve seen before: openness. Being able to give hugs to loved ones. Concerts. Ball games. Being able to go outside, in public, unmasked and without fear…being able to go anywhere you want, at any time you want, without being hassled (or at least being worried you might be), and without risking your life either. And our first responders — our medical personnel, police, fire, rescue, etc. — not to have to risk their lives every day in every way because they have no idea who’s carrying Covid-19, no idea who’s had it, and no idea whether or not their protection is good enough to keep them from getting it.
I think Jesus would appreciate us believing in all of these things, in addition to believing in Him today. (Or at least believing in what he showed us can be possible.)
And that is all I can say today, prayerfully, because I know it to be true.
Surreality, or, the Virus that Ate 2020
Does anyone else feel like they went to bed one day, and woke up in a brand new — albeit distasteful in the extreme — world?
Whenever I drive anywhere for a necessary reason, the land itself looks shrunken, somehow. There are fewer cars. Many fewer people. And even the warmth of the sun (when we see it or can feel it) seems far less than it should be.
I term all of this “surreality.” A contraction of “surreal” and “reality,” surreality is our new normal.
We’re told to stay inside now, because of the virulence of the coronavirus/covid 19. It’s the only way to “flatten the curve” (that is, to make it easier for hospitals and medical personnel to handle this, so we don’t all go at once and overload the system). And most of the places we’d go if we could aren’t open, from the library to most restaurants (though some do have drive-thru or curbside services). Even churches are not exempt, because while we need spiritual solace now as much as we ever have, the coronavirus does not respect the sanctity of the church.
(To put it mildly.)
Even voting is harder than it should be, and I know this because I’m about to go cast my ballot in Wisconsin’s April 7th primary election. I know with my asthma and other health challenges that I do not want to be going out to vote the day of, so I’d better do it today or it won’t get done.
You may be wondering about voting absentee (that is, not in person as an early voter). Where I live, the system is overloaded. I do not trust that I’d get my ballot on time, or at all, unless I actually go in there.
The whole thing is surreal. (Thus, surreality.) The whole world seems to have gone crazy. And the only way we have to deal with this new type of coronavirus (covid-19) is to do what our ancestors would’ve done and stay home.
The more things change, the more they stay the same (as the French say).
Anyway, how has reality shifted or contracted or changed for you? Let me know in the comments. (And is it as surreal for you as it is for me?)
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BTW, if you want to further support what I’m doing, please check out my Patreon account. (I’m not going to ask often; in fact, I don’t think I’ve ever asked before at all. But I will today; humor me, will you?)
Read More, or, How to Stay Sane in a Global Pandemic
Folks, I wrote a week ago or so about the mass hysteria over the corona virus. Since then, more information has come out, and it appears the only thing that can mitigate the damage from this previously unknown virus is “social distancing” — in other words, trying to stay away from people who aren’t members of your nuclear family (or are exceptionally good friends you’ve seen in the past week or two).
Social distancing doesn’t necessarily mean isolation, mind. You can still talk with your friends, even those who you haven’t seen in the past week or two, by phone or by using an internet app like FaceTime or Skype. And if you do go out with someone you’ve seen recently, you can probably walk next to them as per usual; still, to be safe, we’re told to keep six feet apart in public if at all possible.
The hope by doing this is that it’ll give the virus a chance to die out. But no one knows if it’ll work.
But this post is about how to stay sane during this difficult time. And I intend to tell you what helps me the most: Reading books.
In fact, I splurged and bought Sharon Lee and Steve Miller’s newest Liaden Universe book, ACCEPTING THE LANCE. And I enjoyed it immensely. There’s a lot in that book that seems to apply right now — people who’ve been upended by life, having to re-establish themselves, having to learn how to go on in drastically altered circumstances. And the new consensus that comes out of the chaos is a much better one than the previous; it allows for people of great diversity to find ways to talk to one another, and to find ways to help everyone become their best selves.
Yes, it’s only a book. A bit of entertainment, if you will. But there’s a lot of truth in it.
That said, here are some other books I absolutely adore, and believe may help you if you are a SF&F reader (or just want to broaden your horizons).
NIGHT CALLS, KINDRED RITES, SPIRAL PATH — Katharine Eliska Kimbriel
This is the Night Calls trilogy, and it is exceptionally good. Alfreda “Allie” Sorensson is a smart young lady in a frontier version of America that includes magic. And she has a good deal of it. But she’s a practical soul, is Allie, and she knows being strong in anything can scare people. How she finds her own balance and equilibrium during a number of harrowing tests is well worth reading, again and again.
The stories of Stavin Kel’Aniston, starting with ALL THAT GLITTERS — Loren K. Jones
Stavin is my favorite of Loren’s many characters (thus far). He is quite short, feels he’s not attractive or smart or worth anything…then he takes up a dare, meets a dragon, and the dragon is impressed. (Note that Stavin was far too smart to try to kill the dragon.) He’s much more intelligent than he thinks he is, but Stavin is also a young man with a young man’s faults. Who he meets, the challenges he faces, who he loves, and what happens to him are well worth reading about. And you’ll love his wife, Sharindis (or Shari); she knows just what to say to bring him down a peg or two, whenever needed.
Mind, if you want to read something else by Loren, I’m all for it; I’d just start with Stavin, as he’s so much fun.
Finally, I also recommend the stories by Chris Nuttall. He has several great universes going on, but my favorites are his Schooled in Magic universe (featuring Emily, a young lady from Kansas who must learn her magic quickly or she won’t survive) and his Zero universe (where most people have magic, some have a ton — but the people who may have the most power of all are, paradoxically, the Zeros who have none as they’re the only ones who can forge truly awesome weaponry).
So, to find these stories, go to Amazon and look first at Katharine’s page. Then at Loren’s. And finally, at Chris’s…you can’t go wrong, and it may help you deal with this crisis to be reminded that resilience and pluck come in all shapes and sizes.
Mass Hysteria and the Coronavirus
Folks, I have read any number of articles and seen any number of TV programs (and internet programs, for that matter) regarding the coronavirus. It is an infectious disease with no cure; it is a virus; the only way to deal with it is by living through it and taking palliative measures that you’d take if you were dealing with any illness at all.
This is all true.
But the hysteria around the coronavirus — the “we’re all gonna die” feeling — is not helpful. It scares people for no reason. It worries them to the point they go out and buy all the toilet paper in the store, all the bottled water, all the Lysol and disinfecting bleach…and they do this because it’s the only thing they can control.
Illness isn’t fun. I know this, as I’m battling Ye Olde Mystery Illness.
But you can deal with it. You can make sure you have Tylenol on hand. You can get extra rest. You can make sure you have some soup in the house, or something easy to eat, if you are too ill to make something. And you can make sure that you stay mentally healthy, refusing to give in to the hysteria, while you take these preventive measures.
Yes, get more bleach, if it makes you feel better. (I know I’ve bought some extra for both my Mom and myself. But it’s just one bottle with the groceries, not the whole section.) Get Lysol, as you should have that on hand anyway. Get cleaning products (which you should also have on hand). Make sure you wash your hands thoroughly with hot water (by preference; cold water beats nothing). And remember that washing your hands is by far preferable to hand sanitizer, but if all you have is hand sanitizer for some reason, use it as it’s better than nothing at all. (The good ones have alcohol in them. The not-so-good ones that don’t do much at all don’t.)
Now, all of this is just common-sensical stuff. This is what most of us can do about anything when it comes to our health. And when we think about it that way, there’s no reason to panic.
But the reason people are panicking is very simple: Coronavirus is new. People don’t know what’ll happen to them. It is infectious. It is dangerous to people who are dealing with respiratory issues or are older adults (I don’t like the word “elderly,” so I’ll just say “older adults,” OK?).
And “new viral illness” that’s killed people, and shut down most of the country of Italy, is scary. The progression of the disease, how fast it moves, and how it can kill people — that, too, is scary.
So I’m not saying to take it lightly.
All I’m saying is, don’t give in to the hysteria. That gets you nowhere. It wastes your energy to no purpose.
Instead, be prepared — moderately so (don’t buy all the toilet paper on the shelves, OK?) — and do whatever your doctor tells you to do if you get it.
That’s all you can do with these unknown illnesses. (Or really, anything unknown at all.)
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